Home for the Holidays

 

Having everyone come to us was amazing.  Loved missing the holiday travel.  Best Christmas since I found my red jeep power wheel in the bathtub when I was six.  

Avery's first response when she found out that Allie's husband would be joining us for Christmas, 

"Brady's coming?  You invited him?"  

"Sorry Ave's they are kind of a package deal now. . ."

Being hostess wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.  The nice thing about being a bad cook is that everyone is more than happy to let you "just relax".  The only meal I actually cooked was reheating mashed potatoes and gravy for Enzo for breakfast one morning.  Okay, that's a lie.  I was never actually awake early enough for breakfast.

    

I had this awesome idea to walk the mile loop at Cherokee Park.  Which I thought would be charming, seeing as the park was designed by Frederick Law Olmsted also the designer of Central Park in New York City, ever heard of it?  Louisville's kind of a big deal.  Anyway, as the "mile loop" turned out to actually be two and a half miles, Jesse accused me of forced exercising him.  If only Jesse knew how truly oblivious I really am.  The next day the kids complained that there legs hurt.  Shirkers and slackers, every last one of 'em.

The spirit I felt most this year has been of gratitude.  Everywhere I look I am reminded that I exist because someone first loved me, my Heavenly parents, then my earthly parents, and now Jess.  I am so proud of him and grateful for the life he is building for our family.  As embarrassing as it might be, both of our parents still help us so much.  And I know that we are only this far because of them.  Because they provided opportunity we could not offer ourselves.  Any good that we are, was not our doing.  We can't claim it.  It was a gift, a gift from someone who first loved us.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.  --John 3:16

Merry Christmas!

Thankful

for good friends.

2nd Annual Carmel Apples with the Warners

I like this fall tradition, it's a keeper.

Meritocracy

Add equal parts

Mummy Wrap 

Donuts on a String 

Bobbing for Apples 

Pumpkin Walk

Mix in a few overindulged children and you have yourself a 

 Middle-class Halloween Party.

We did our best to prepare the kids for the real world.  Although everyone received a goodie-bag, there were special prizes for the winner of each game. It was a liberals worst nightmare.  No redistribution of wealth.  No hand outs.  They had to earn it.  And you better believe there were tears.  

Good 'ol fashioned competition.

"Meritocracy (merit, from Latin mereō: “earn” + -cracy, from Ancient Greek κράτος, kratos: “strength, power”) is a political philosophy that holds power should be vested in individuals according to merit.^[1] Advancement in such a system is based on intellectual talent measured through examination and/or demonstrated achievement in the field where it is implemented."

Littering

Thanks principally to "Wild Kratts" and "Go Diego Go!" my kids believe that there are very few villains worse than a litterer.  Avery insisted that Grandpa clean up a stream at a park in South Carolina while we visited my brother and his family.  Never mind the playground; we had work to do.  In an effort to impress my daughter, I too began cleaning the streets.  When I almost picked up a four foot snake, I decided it wasn't for me.

Sorry Mother Earth.
 In an effort to make it up to you, I'm going to

start walking to the mailbox instead of driving

boycott styrofoam cups AND utensils
no longer let the car idle while I pump gas
reduce air pollution by only smoking indoors 

and stop doing a courtesy flush

You're welcome.

Apple Picking in North Carolina with Cousin Lucy

By far the most beautiful apple orchard I have ever been to.  It began at the top of the mountain and extended down to the valley.  Why are donuts and cider only a fall thing?

Answer me this.

Enzo & Mason

I am so glad to have Becca here in town with me.  Having a son Enzo's age was just an added bonus.  They play so well together.

Mommy, What does this say?

 Avery asks me as she holds up a neon orange door hanger.

Dear Valued Customer,

Your garbage bins will be picked up due to nonpayment 
unless you bring your account into current status. 
Thank you!

Louisville Waste Management

"This was on our door?"

"No, it was on the neighbor's door."

"Avery!!  Okay, go put this back exactly as your found it."

Eight Years

Sarah Marie Jackson + Jesse Evan Jenkins

October 8, 2005

Our Life by the Numbers

8 years
96 months
417 weeks
2,922 days
70,126 hours
4,207,950 minutes

3 kids
2 dogs
1 cat

7 cities
2 countries
14 moves

10 houses
5 cars
2 scooters

100's of fights
100's of makeups

Eternity:  The number of anniversaries I look forward to spending with you.  

Love, Jess

September 23rd

"Mrs.  Jenkins, this is Deb from Kenwood Station Elementary calling, I am the school nurse here and it has been brought to my attention that your daughter Avery has brought some topical medication to school.  Now, you understand that I am not permitted to release this drug back into her care and send it home with her.  You will have to come and pick it up yourself."  (15 minutes into the school day)

"Sarah, this is Ms.  Lucy.  I need to talk to you about your son Caleb's behavior and I would rather speak to you about it in person, would you be able to come over to the school right now?"  (45 minutes before dismissal)

Avery brought anti itch cream into school unbeknownst to me.  She must have been advertising it, for it to make it down to the school nurse and back to me before I even got home from dropping her off at school.  I apologized and told her to please discard it for me.  But what I wanted to say and what I think she expected me to say was, 

"Yes.  Now, you understand that I leave all pharmaceutical drugs on Avery's nightstand just in case she were to wake up in the middle of the night she could pop her own Vicodin and I"d be able to grab a tight eight hours."

And for Caleb, he ran away from his teacher at the playground.  When she finally found him, an older middle aged woman had him in custody and was refusing to release him.  She wanted to call the police, file a report and" talk to the parents of the child and let them know they have my support to sue you!"  Poor Ms. Lucy.  Caleb is always wandering off.  

Last month we went to Iowa for Allie's wedding reception, Jess had to work so it was just the kids and me.  It took about 7 hours to get there, and I was the only one with a drivers license (although after driving with three small children alone, by 1 AM the thought of Avery behind the wheel was more tempting than you might think).  While we were there Caleb became very sick and we had to take him to the urgent care; he had an ugly ear infection.  By this point in the trip Aunt Elizabeth realizing how unenjoyable sharing a hotel room with children is, particularly at night, wised up and opted to bunk with her mother and Avery in another room, leaving Caleb, Enzo and I to our own room.   Requesting double beds instead of a king was at the least wishful thinking if not a giant mistake.  But then again maybe it doesn't matter since my boys are such cuddlers we might as well have slept in a roll away with one pillow.  By night three I was beat.  At about 7 am the next morning I woke up to knocking on the door.  I opened my eyes to find the curtains wide open and the sun glaring down on my sweaty body.  Why am I sweating?  Why is the heater on?  Why can anyone walking by see me laying here in my underwear?  Where are my kids?  Who's at the door?  

Caleb and Enzo.

They had gone to the continental breakfast.  By themselves.  Caleb was still chewing on his apple when he knocked on the door.  I was dead to the world.  I will never again stay in a hotel that doesn't have the inside latch on the door.  We left that night.

So CPS, come and get them.  I won't even put up a fight, I have no leg to stand on.  I am completely unfit to parent.

I am in way over my head.

Ms. Lucy

Caleb's new friends (Blake, Sawyer, and George)

Caleb loves to bake.  He wanted to share his homemade sugar cookies with his friends, so we decorated paper bags and surprised them.

Ms. Lucy's bag had kisses on it. Mwa!

His favorite bunny statue (He pays a visit to him every school day)

Homemade juice pops

Cheerio Necklace

Ms. Lucy is the best preschool teacher!  A total overachiever (just how I like it) she posts pictures of the kids every day here. Caleb loves Ms. Lucy, 

"She's not just my teacher mom, she's my friend"

Impetigo Contagiosa, HFMD, and Valium

"Poor guy,  If he didn't have bad luck, he'd have no luck at all."  -- Enzo's pediatrician

"The laughing gas doesn't seem to be working, perhaps we should try a light sedative, like Valium"  -- Caleb's dentist

"Dad, did you know that hand-foot-and-mouth disease is one the most contagious diseases known to man?"  --Avery per Mariah's mother

All said today to Jesse and me.  Enzo has hand-foot-and-mouth AND impetigo, Caleb refused to open his mouth for the dentist and after a 25 minute fit Dr.  Sorenson suggested drugging him before we come back, and Avery explained that the reason she couldn't share her homemade donut holes with the neighbor was because Enzo had touched each one of them and he has hfmd.  Saying hand-foot-and mouth is like yelling "gun" in a crowd.  They couldn't come up with something a little more difficult for a six year old to pronounce?  They call the common cold nasopharyngitis or acute coryza.   The only thing that would send women and children scurrying faster than yelling "turd" in a pool is mentioning the dreaded hand-foot-and-mouth disease.  And honestly, I would run too.  So if anyone is looking for us, we'll be in quarantine.

 

Allie McCrea Jenkins

Tied the knot

The Man

I am sure most of you are as outraged as we are that Netflix divorced Viacom, thus loosing great Nickelodeon shows, i.e. Backyardigans, Diego, WonderPets.  But no one is more upset than Caleb.  He always tells me, "The man has taken Backyardigans off of Netflix.  We need to call him."

Well, yesterday a couple internet technicians were setting up our service in the new house.  This was Caleb's opportunity to confront "the man".  

"Umm, excuse me.  Why did you take Backyardigans off?"

"What?"

"Could you put my shows back on?"

"It's working now."

"No it's not.  It's gone."

"No, it's working now."

"Please?"

At this point, I realized in Caleb's mind the internet guy was "the man".

Mariah

Avery has made a new friend, Mariah, conveniently she is also our next door neighbor.  One of the first  visits over Avery noticed that Mariah's house needed picking up.  Graciously, she told Mariah's mother,

"My mom could come over and help you clean if you want.  She's really good at it." 

So much for introductions.

Spring

I had the best Spring.  We spent it with my parents in Muncie.  We had so much fun.  My mom watched the kids for a week while Jess and I flew out to Utah to meet Brady, his sister Allie's fiance, celebrate his graduation from Medical school, and be with his mother Jani on Mother's Day.  Vacation without the kids? Amazing.   The lame person that I am didn't document or take pictures of any of it.   I just have a few snapshots Jess took with his high tech flip phone.  

We welcomed my newest nephew Simon into the world.  I miss these two so much.

Jesse turned 32.  He really wanted a smoker; which of course, was out of our price range.  However, these terra-cotta pots were not.  The gas money driving an hour to Indianapolis in search of a wire grill, was probably the most expensive part.  Unfortunately the trip proved fruitless; the rack was the wrong size.  Persistence paid off, after Jesse decided to drop the lawsuit against Home Depot for false advertising, and he found what he needed at Menards just down the street from us.  Eventually, it all came together, creating some of the best pulled pork the world has ever known.  He's a combination of MacGyver and Bobby Flay.

Enzo turned two.

I've never seen our kitty more happy, scaling my parents roof and catching anything that moves, including baby bunnies.

It was early morning when Avery came screaming down the hall, 

"The kitty has a baby bunny in her mouth!"

I jumped out of bed to peer out the window and finding it still alive responded Sarah-like with blood curdling screams followed by demands that Jesse get out of bed and save the poor thing.  At this point, all the children were crying.

The bunny was wounded and slightly bleeding, so Jess wrapped it in a towel and in our pajamas we all hopped into the car (no pun intended) in pursuit of saving the bunny's life.  As I was backing out of the driveway Avery said,  

"Umm, Mom, you sure you don't want to wear a hat?"

Which reminded me of when Allie said to Elizabeth as we are all headed out to church, "Elizabeth, do you want a hair tie?"  Rude.  

When we arrived at the rescue center and the nurse threw out the word "euthanize", I knew our work was done.  I shouted that we had saved the bunny, grabbed the kids, and made a b-line to the exit.  

On the way home in an effort to help the kids avoid ill feelings towards the kitty, I tried to explain the nature of cats if they were living in the wild.  Avery quickly interrupted me,

"Mom, the kitty didn't hurt the bunny.  She found him like that.  She was bringing him to us so we could get him help.  She saved him!"

That works too.