Christmas 2021

 COVID, the gift that keeps on giving.  How about the curse of losing your taste?  As if it’s not bad enough having everything taste like styrofoam, how about stumbling upon the unwanted realization that you’re more of an emotional eater than you allowed yourself to believe?  Proof was in the Doritos, that you found yourself mindlessly eating what very well should have been carrots.  Thankfully, there was a silver lining to be found in the loss of smell, all the fart blaming ceased and the dogs were finally allowed reprieve.

            Hannah (21) graduated college a year early and took her first big girl job in Seattle.  Fortunately, younger Hannah had ignored all of Troy’s warnings on the toxicity of social media because those countless hours as a teen are precisely what positioned her for her day job of marketing on Instagram and TikTok. However, had she heeded his warnings on the danger of speeding perhaps she would have avoided crashing the Tesla (or the Corolla, or the Accord, or the Lexus).  Certainly, evidence of God’s plan for her to be in Seattle working from home and traveling by foot, or at least Geico’s plan.

Lydia (17) is a senior in high school and has earned an honorary PhD in the art of skipping school (the excused part making it an art).  The impact of NTI during the pandemic has left its mark and attending class has become a form of oppression.  Luckily, freedom is in reach as she plans to attend college out of state next year.  #FreeLydia

            Avery (14) continues to impart her middle school wisdom on us, such as “wearing your hair in a ponytail causes a receding hairline” and “good hair is like makeup for guys, it really matters.” Not sure she’s wrong. Ironically, she utters both the dumbest and brightest things of our children, and could arguably be our smartest child, well at least smartest mouthed child.  

Caleb (12) has become increasingly social and increasingly socially awkward, as are most prepubescent tweens. Texting is a good example of this, as he wants to have friends but seems to be only capable of one-word responses.  Luckily, he has mastered other forms of teen communication such as screaming at the top of his lungs into his Xbox headset. He continues to be as forgetful as I am forgiving and we are only on his third coat for the season.

Enzo (10), towering over his classmates by at least a foot, has become a self-appointed vigilante due to an inordinate amount of violence/bad behavior happening in the 4^th grade.  To my delight, he is all bark and no bite.  Though when it comes to money matters, he is all spend and no save.  Not even my perfect child is perfect.

Troy’s love for technology continues to grow and at times I find myself envious of the way he stares, mesmerized at the Roomba (as if he’s ever vacuumed) or how he excitedly talks about the newest Apple update for his iPhone.  It isn’t all bad since Troy now does all the vacuuming and I do enjoy the perks of sending any and all tech questions his way as I claim stupid instead of lazy.  Though in truth it’s probably both.

And as for me, I’ve unofficially hung up my real estate hat.  As it turns out, husbands aren’t particularly fond of listening to their wives complain and whine about the stressors of work and Troy has kindly asked me to please, “stop helping.”  Which seemed fair since I did suggest he please, “stop helping” with the shopping after having brought home an $800 robot vacuum when I asked for a broom and multiple industrial-sized windshield ice scrapers. It’s about the intentions. Not really. In lieu of earning a paycheck, I have committed myself to focus on little, incremental gains, like not going to Target today to buy my deodorant and saving $273.18.  Here’s to small wins in 2022!

The Corbin/Jenkins Family